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"Online Dating Fatigue"

Online dating is now well established in society and has become the dominate way of meeting people. The days of people being embarrassed to say their relationship started online are fading and when one relationship fails a new online dating account and potential partners are just a few clicks away. The positives are obvious. In a the fast paced and overly isolated society we live in many people are alone and time poor and online dating provides a way to meet a wide selection of people and hopefully find someone special they can develop a relationship with. But what about the negatives?

Pre Online Dating - Growing up in the 80's and 90's mobile phones and the Internet were in there infancy so contact between people was very limited compared to today. Meeting people usually occurred at school, work, bars, parties or other social settings and getting to know someone was slower involving house phone calls and planned outings. The advantages were you met limited people so when you met someone you liked it was very special and relationships developed slower so you got to know the person in a more natural way. This created a stronger connection between couples and relationships that were healthier and more likely to last.

Post Online Dating - since the 2000's people have started to use online dating more as a connecting method. When someone joins their first Dating site they have innocence about them. Looking at hundreds/thousands of profiles, viewing pictures and chatting to people quickly opens a smorgasbord of opportunities that are not available in any other area of life. Rather than shyly smiling at the office colleague they have like for the last year they have potential access to chat and meet a staggering number of potential partners. This quickly evolves into mobile details being exchange and meetings.

The sad reality of online dating is long term users rarely find what they are after

At first glance this could appear to be a good thing and for some it is. But for many it creates a problem of too much opportunity then making it hard to settle with one person. Thoughts like "there might be a better person so I'll keep looking or why not date a few at once" can quickly cross people's minds so the person keeps pursing online dating opportunities. There is also a buzz that comes from meeting new people online which a person can become addicted to. Why remain in a long winded relationship that becomes routine when you can have the thrill and attention of new and exciting opportunities endlessly.

Eventually over time online dating fatigue sets in. A person with online dating fatigue would typically have been an online dater for over a year, have accounts on multiple sites, been on countless person to person dates and logon daily to get their fix of attention and connection. A person in this position is addicted to meeting people, finds it almost impossible to settle for one person and has long lost the innocent hope that the right one will come along online. They pursue online dating more out of habit and their ability to have a long term loyal rewarding relationship becomes more and more distant. The sad reality of online dating is long term users rarely find what they are after and actually greatly reduce their ability to be satisfied by one person and enjoy a fulfilling loving connection with someone special.

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